If You Married An Introvert… {More Than Fine}

Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you.  Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy to bear and the burden I give you is light.” – Matthew 11:28-30


Rest [anapauo] to cause or permit one to cease from any movement or labour in order to recover and collect his strength.

Brent is an introvert to the bone.  And although he is a people person (I’d hope so, he’s a pastor)  he refuels in silence…alone.  And almost twelve years of marriage has told me that if I don’t make space for him to recharge, just him, his thoughts and Jesus, then he functions on 50% or less.

At best.

As a card-carrying extrovert, ahem, this bothers the fire out of me.  Being alone for too long zaps life from my veins.  I need people like I need Starbucks.  And I don’t mean just 10-year-old-kids and younger.  Unfortunately, they don’t count.  I need a room full of spin bikes with sweaty people.  I need a church crowd on Sunday morning.  I love a small group on Monday night.  I need an awesome set of neighbors coming outside on a sunny day (check!).

Brent – introvert.

Becky – extrovert.

Feel the tension?

But no matter, Jesus (emphatically) commands us here to “Come to Him” and find rest from our labor in order to “recover and collect our strength.”

Anybody need a witness?  Are you raising your hand because you need that kind of rest for your soul.  Do you need to collect your strength this weekend?  Are you weary?  Carrying a heavy burden?  Do you need a lighter load?  The kind that is easy to bear?

This is the Jesus-Kind-Of-Rest.  And it is only found one place….  In Him.

Wives, make space this weekend for your groom to refuel.  Husbands, make room for your bride to recharge how she needs.

We are better spouses when we rest.

For the Crenshaw’s this has been a learning curve because Brent and I recharge so differently.  And instead of getting offended because Brent needs to be away from us to feel better, {grin} I have come to understand an introvert.  He needs solitude. And if I don’t encourage him to take some, then we have another “going to bed early and driving to clear his head” night.

This Saturday and Sunday let’s pray for our spouse to find rest the way that serves them best.  In solitude or in social settings, it’s no matter.  What matters is they carry the easy-to-bear yoke of Christ.

picmonkey_imageLord Jesus, thank you for your offer, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy loads.”  I pray over ( spouse’s name ) this weekend and ask you for a soul-deep recharge.  Let me be sensitive to this need and may I be instrumental in making it happen.  Thank you for Your yoke that is easy to bear and your burden which is light.  Restore and recharge our marriage this weekend.  Let us enter into sacred space with You.  For it is in Your presence we will find rest for our souls. In Jesus Name, Amen.

“Thou hast made us for thyself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in thee.” – Augustine of Hippo, The Confessions of Saint Augustine

Do you and your spouse recharge differently?  Write a comment sharing how you can make space for him or her to find rest this weekend.

One thought on “If You Married An Introvert… {More Than Fine}

  1. We do recharge differently – but we’re both on the introvert side more than the extrovert. Hubby likes to be alone and walk/sing/pray. I like to hide out (also alone) and read or sew, and I like to pray as I drive. But the funny thing is, we both enjoy recharging together at times too. Just being together is a recharge.

I means so much to hear from you!

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