31 Days :: Say NO to the Toe

I was quite a scaredy-cat when Brent and I first married.

He will tell you, if I heard a bump in the night, I would wake him. We lived in a line of cookie-cutter condominiums. I was unfamiliar with the people and the area. And I am a firm believer that nothing good happens after midnight. Brent was becoming all too familiar with a tap on the shoulder and hearing my hushed, “Honey. I just heard something. Will get up to check?”


(How annoying I must have been.)

I am proud to say I have out grown this – for the most part. Or maybe having small children has left me so dog gone tired that even the boogie man would have a hard time waking me up.
But ask Brent about the first time I ever woke him with a nightmare. Now that will get a laugh.

I can’t recall the dream itself, but I do remember how upset I was when I woke myself up out of it. Nudge nudge…{whisper} “Brent. Brent. I had a bad dream.”

Nothing. No movement. Nothing.

Nudge again, “Brent. I had a bad dream. Honey?” Looking back, I don’t know what I expected him to do. A hug? A snuggle? A little pat on the head? But I wanted him to know – I Had A Bad Dream.

Then, he gave a grunt. And consoled me in a way I had never been consoled before — with his big toe.

Yes, you read that right. Under the covers, he took his big toe and rubbed my leg. My shin actually. Oh geez. Whew. I feel so much better now.

He and I laugh about it still. What empathy. What compassion his big toe showed me! Such consolation.

{laughing out loud}

Comfort the fainthearted, uphold the weak, be patient with all. 1 Thessalonians 5:14


Fast forward almost ten years and three kids later.
I see a lot of big toe rubbin’ going on between our little boys, too.

Ethan falls and gets hurt. Grant just walks away. (Big toe rub)

Grant smashed his finger. Ethan barely acknowledges him. (Big toe rub)

Luke hits his head on the armoire door. The boys monotonely say, “Mom. Luke hit his head.”(Big toe rub)

“Boys, let’s practice compassion towards your brother. Walk over to him. Touch his shoulder. Get on his level. Ask him if he is OK. Put yourself in his place. Think about how he feels. Ask what you can do to help. Does he need ice? A band aid? A drink of water? The Bible says, “be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble.” (1 Peter 3:8) Let’s do the Bible and show compassion.”

I am not exaggerating. I have to step-by-step walk my kids through this. It does not come natural to them. Maybe this is a boy thing. Not sure.

But I am sure of this – Compassion is a Jesus thing. And it is important we get it.

“Be Compassionate”: (sympathēs) suffering or feeling the like with another, sympathetic

I might have to implement a new motto around here: “Say NO to the Big Toe.” How funny.

I am curious to know…do you all see this at your home, too? A lack of compassion amongst siblings? Is it just us?

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2 thoughts on “31 Days :: Say NO to the Toe

  1. Becky,Training our children is continuous. It takes perseverance! You may feel like your children will never get it, but take heart! You will reap what you sow in the hearts of your children. Someday, you will realize that they not only get it, but you will see them living it! What a joy to a mother's heart. I've been on both ends. His word does not return void, especially if you teach your children the GOSPEL. Without the gospel, they won't get it.Keep running the race! Love,Tina

I means so much to hear from you!

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