Knocking At The Door Of My Heart

This morning, I was startled out of a sound sleep.

Knock, knock, knock.

Loud and alarming.

A quick gasp. Head off of my pillow.

The clock read 4:00. Exactly.

I strain my ear through the silence. My husband sound asleep beside me. He heard nothing.

I hold my breath and listen. And listen.

Nothing except the shush of white noise from the boy’s room. The buzz of a fan above me.

But knocking? None.

I lower my head slowly to my pillow.

Then I hear, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” Luke 11:9


Whispering to my heart. Knock, Becky. Seek me. Rise up and come. It is time. Walk through the door that I have opened. Knowing now who was knocking. Not at the front door of my house, but standing on the front stoop of my heart.

I obediently wrap my robe around me and go down to make coffee. (I’m pretty sure that is the first thing I was to do. Make coffee. Right?)

I come, Lord. Seeking.

Seek (zēteō): to aim at. To strive for; desire. To crave. TO SEEK TO PROMOTE THE GLORY OF GOD.

Yes. To promote His Glory. My deepest desire.

Lord, this weekend I walk. With boldness, as Your Word says, through an open door. A retreat that You prepared, in your Sovereignty, before the foundation of the world. When I was being knit in secret, You were event planning. This weekend. For me. And for the twenty-seven other ladies who will come. We come…seeking to promote Your Glory. We come… Craving. Desiring. Striving to enter into your rest. Anticipating Your meeting us there. Expecting your Holy Spirit to fall upon us. Thank You. In advance, thank You.

Will you pray?

Today begins a weekend retreat for the women of God who attend Fellowship Bible Church, Knoxville. Will you pray over us? Pray for God’s Spirit to fall, for His Word to move and touch our lives. Please pray for our protection. Please pray for our speaker (ahem) that she would be less so He could be more. Pray God would knit our hearts to His and to each other.

And speaking of open doors, the Lord continues to point me towards the She Speaks conference this coming July. If you, too, are still praying about God’s plan for you as a speaker, writer or women’s ministry leader, then this conference may be a great opportunity. Ann Voskamp’s is offering a scholarship to the conference on her blog this week. Visit here for more information.

I am learning to act on my God-given passions. And never to ignore His prompting. Heaven forbid me to miss Him. Ever.

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