Another day, another group of women, another lesson learned:
I sat at a baby shower, eating a piece of chocolate cake and enjoying a child-free, Spring morning with a room full of other child-free mommies.
All the husbands watching kiddos while we celebrated a new mom and baby-to-be.
In the midst finger foods, laughing, and present unwrapping enters a daddy. With his two-year-old son.
“I just stopped by to get him something for lunch. I totally forgot.”
The hostess (and mommy of that little two-year-old boy) jumped up and grabbed a bag. She stuffed it with crackers, cheese sticks, grapes and a sippy, handed it to the daddy and “shoo-ed” him out the door.
The door had barely closed behind him. “Idiot. He doesn’t even know how to fix a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.”
A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones. Proverbs 12:4
Am I ever decay in Brent’s bones?
We have a “dumb guy” epidemic in our culture. Seriously. Watch a Hardee’s commercial. You’ll see what I mean.
Sleepy-headed, hung-over looking man, stumbles to the kitchen. He grabs a box of cereal and fumbles it to the ground. Then he drops eggs in the floor. Poor guy. He doesn’t know how to make his own breakfast.
Or the yogurt commercial where the husband thinks he’s been eating Boston Creme pie this whole time and can’t figure out how he’s loosing weight, but come to find out it was really low-fat yogurt the whole time. Or the ….
I could go on.
Media is horrible about this. And it really frustrates me.
Where’s the Marlboro man? I mean. Sure he smoked, but I bet he knew how to fry an egg.
The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, not harm all the days of her life. Proverbs 31:11,12
Am I doing my husband good? Do I speak well of him? Is my character a good reflection on his?
Oh, how I want it to be.
Wives, let’s resolve today, to stop speaking negatively about our mates. Let’s resolve to encourage them in their jobs, as fathers, as providers, as leaders. And rebel against the epidemic.
If you want a strong leader in your home, start talking to him like he is one.
Watch him stand a little taller when you do.
Point out all that he does – For your family. For your finances. For your children. And thank him. Even if it is painful to do so.
His heart will trust in you all the more.
Love Dare #3
Fighting fair: Talk with your spouse about establishing healthy rules of engagement. If your mate is not ready for this, then write out your own personal rules to “fight” by. Resolve to abide by those rules when the next disagreement occurs.
Love note: Think about your husband or wife’s vulnerabilities. If you protect them when you argue, your spouse will likely trust you more. If you don’t pursue a win at all costs mind-set, you may both take more times to listen to what is upsetting both of you.
An additional giveaway! Leave a comment, become a new follower to The Word of God and a Cup of Joe or share today’s post with friends (Facebook, Twitter, Email) and enter to win another copy of the Dare to Love Booklet. Let us know what you do and how many times. The winner will be announced over the weekend.
Good morning Becky, earlier this week I posted Ur link on my Facebook page….and will do so again today! I just wanted to drop by and tell u how much of an inspiration you are and I am loving reading Brent's side this is awesome…I need to get the book and work on it with Chris! Luv u! Tracie C.
Thanks Tracie!! Love you too!
Fighting Fair, that is something I need to work on. I appreciate your and Brent's study. I've read some of the Love Dare book, but suggestions on what we can do with each day is so helpful. Thanks.
Becky–thanks for sharing your heart..all that God is teaching you and doing in your marriage. Thanks for building us UP!Meditating more and reflecting on being a wife of NOBLE character and not decay in my man's bones!
Hey, girl! Love your marriage series! 🙂 Love YOU!
Hey girl! I am so enjoying this segment of your blog. I often cringe when I hear others who speak unflattering of their spouses. I am someone who really tries not to do that, though I'm sure I've had my moments. What I find more often is that I envy others for what their spouses do (positively) and wish my hubby were more like them instead of just appreciating him for who he is and what he's capable of:-/
Jana! I'm with you. It is easy to slip into the "If he'd only do this" mindset. God has given us exactly who we need as husbands!
love this post! i am so guilty of the "dumb husband syndrome" :(it seems like it is even easier to succumb to this in the midst of friends….one starts bashing her husband, then we all join in and have a great bonding session over what idiots our husbands are – yikes!! when i think about this, i literally cringe and my heart breaks. if my husband were speaking about me that way, i would DIE! it would be such a crushing blow to my self-esteem….why would i want to do the same to him?! thanks for the reminder that i need to be doing my husband "good" and not "harm"….my bible study this week was on being a blessing to my husband and the many ways i can do that – obviously this is an area of my life/marriage that the Lord knows i need to work on! thanks again for sharing….i'm really enjoying these posts! 🙂
I'm not a fan of the "dumb husband" ads! I like them about as much as I like to see scantily dressed women in an ad for shrubs (yes, I've seen that)! They're just pointless!! I very rarely say something negative about my husband, because he really is so good to me! But, I definitely should fight more fair! We don't fight very often ~ but when we do, I want to be right. He'd rather get along than be right, so I "win". But it doesn't feel very good, 'cuz I really don't win anything!!
I love this post. I often think about this topic when I hear, yet another woman, immasculate her husband in front of others. WHen did this become appropriate? And it doesn't just end with husbands, I hear many people disrespect/humiliate their children in front of others and it is very painful to watch. Thanks for addressing this and for giving me some verses to pray upon today. And always, thanks for your inspiration! Love ya!
Hey Becky! It always surprises me when I hear that women talk about their husbands that way. He is precious gift from God to us and we are to honor him. I don't eat at Hardees either, can't stand their commercials. Thanks for talking about this!
I absolutely agree! If you believe in a man he will live to step up to the plate and live up to what you believe!