I have an emotional connection to this image.
There is seriously a light-hearted, running joke on Facebook about how many people have seen me at Target lately.
I love the place. In a very unhealthy way.
The Lord has revealed a few painful things this past week. My hidden sin.
So, today, I confess. No matter how badly my pride hurts, I am baring all.
Here is an excerpt from my journal. Written in the thick of an “Ah Ha!” moment with Jesus.
Written after I read this verse…
“Keep your life free from the love of money, and be content with what you have, for [God] has said, “I will never leave you or forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5
Lord, I see my hidden sin. Now exposed. My attitude toward money. Discontentment. I am exposed by your living Word – it is discerning the thoughts and intentions of my heart. If I continue in my hidden sin, now made known, it will be have dominion over me. Declare me innocent. May the meditations of my heart be acceptable in your sight. May my offerings be clean. Purify me.
Psalm 19:14 reads
Let the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.
Meditations: (higgayown) means devices. Plotting.
Acceptable: (ratsown) pleasure, delightful, desired
This is a very familiar verse, but let me tell you what I’ve learned.
Don’t miss this. This verse comes from the language of sacrifice – as seen in Leviticus 22:20
The Lord tells Moses, “You shall not offer anything that has a blemish, for it will not be acceptable for you.”
The Lord expects us to present ourselves to him – as a living sacrifice. (Romans 12:1) This includes the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart.
So scripture asks of me: “Are my thoughts acceptable? Are my words acceptable? What do I plot in my heart? What is my heart doing – even at Target.”
Remember all of my junk drawers? Yes, all of my soul-mess. The Lord is revealing that my attitude towards money and contentment are unacceptable.
I am a good-steward of my money.
But God doesn’t want a good sacrifice.
He desires excellence.
I am asking him to purify my attitude towards money. And contentment.
I long to be an excellent steward.
To give more.
And spend less.
(Dave Ramsey would be proud)
I want to share more about my Target and discontentment issues…next blog.
Lord, I am feeling very naked today. Exposed by your Word. Vulnerable in the Blogsphere. But, I want to be obedient. And you have led me here. I am asking you to expose us. Reveal our sin and purify us. May we all present ourselves as living sacrifices. Holy. Acceptable. This is our spiritual act of worship. May the words of our mouths and the meditations of our hearts be an acceptable offering to you today. O precious Lord, our rock and redeemer.
I completely understand & struggle with it, too. I know that when my focus is on Him, I think about material possessions less! Why is it so hard to keep my focus sometimes?!