Spiritually speaking, that’s the adjective to describe my spirit the past few days.
Not dry. Not disobedient. Not negligent. Not glum.
But, lacking zest, vivacity, luster … Dull.
I have been in the Word. I have spent time with the Lord. I have been in prayer. But my spirit has still been dull.
This was the question I posed to the Lord yesterday morning. “How is it, Lord, that I can still serve, read, pray, worship, be in community, but walk through life with a dull spirit? What am I missing?”
What causes a Christian to be dull?
Well, it could be different things….Disobedience. Living by works. Going through spiritual motions. Trying to please man not God. Hardship. Illness. Busyness. (Bingo)
There is was. Busyness. We have a lot going on. A new school for Grant. Brent is on Campus gearing up for a new semester. My grandmother had minor surgery. Homeschooling, etc.
We are just BUSY.
But all my bustling has taken my attention away from my energy supply – the Lord.
My heart is still crazy about Him, yes, but the activity of life buys for my attention. And affection.
Back to yesterday. As I was asking the Lord about this, He brought to memory a conversation I had with my mentor a couple of weeks ago. She pointed me to Joshua 1:8.
Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it.
Meditate on it day and night.
Meditate. Now there’s a word culture has redefined. When I hear “mediate” I instantly think of deep breathing. Centering yourself. Flexible women in cute yoga pants, cross-legged on a purple mat. And humming. 🙂
But in Joshua the word meditate (Hiphil) means to mutter.
Mutter His Word day and night. Speak His Word. Remember His Word. Think on His Word. Recite His Word. Pray His Word. Focus on His Word. Day and Night.
Mutter (def.) to utter words indistinctly. To yourself.
“Yes, Lord. I see. I have been faithful in Your Word. Prayerful. I’ve spent time with you. BUT I LEFT YOU AT THE KITCHEN TABLE. I didn’t bring Your Word with me. As soon as I stood up from that chair, I started muttering my to do list, my frustrations, orders to my boys, expectations on my husband. I have been muttering. But not your Word.”
This gets good….So then I prayed, “Lord, give me Scripture to mediate on. Bring to memory Your Word to mutter.”
Without hesitation, “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.” Psalm 51:10.
Wow, that was quick.
Renew a steadfast spirit. Renew my dull heart.
I looked it up.
Renew means “to be new. To repair. To restore. It is the same word used in Scripture meaning TO POLISH A SWORD.”
“Polish this dull sword, Jesus!”
“Repair my busy spirit. Make my weary heart new again. Restore to me the joy of your salvation!” (Psalm 51:11)
The Sword of the spirit is the Word of God (Ephesians 6:17). Heaven forbid me dull it! I realize that I have been heading into battle without my weapon. I was unarmed. Vulnerable. And a bit defeated.
But, hallelujah, no more.
For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. – Hebrews 4:12
I pray you are renewed as you meditate on His Word today.